All I want to know now is ... since it's made out of seat belts, it should keep all my money safe, right? Right.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Because Safety is our Number One Priority
My dad got me all this seat belt material from work, and though I made a purse out of it years ago, I decided it was time for another one. Ta-Dah! With a zipper and fully lined.
All I want to know now is ... since it's made out of seat belts, it should keep all my money safe, right? Right.
All I want to know now is ... since it's made out of seat belts, it should keep all my money safe, right? Right.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Full Keyboard!
My family has recently come into some new electronic items. Our family computer just broke (not my doing, I use a different computer) so we just received a new computer in the mail. My dad decided to buy a Blackberry Pearl, and my brother just got a Samsung Gravity.
Yes. My brother got a new phone. You might wonder why I'm so confounded that he got a new phone, but never fear, explanation is imminent.
The first phone my brother had was a really old Samsung phone (no camera, black and white frontscreen). It was extremely small and fit in pants pockets with little to no notice by the user. My brother didn't notice it enough to remove it from his pocket before he washed his jeans. Miraculously, it survived the washing machine and the dryer!
This phone was also the same phone my brother took to Cedar Point, where it fell out of his pocket when he was on one of the rides. So of course, he got off the ride and realized his phone is missing. He came home and promptly ordered another phone. But then, someone mailed this phone back! Oh well. Two phones!
(Side note: during this intermediate phone missing time, my brother borrowed my mom's pretty pink Motorola Razr, which he promptly lost. We haven't found it since.)
The second phone was the one that my brother decided that he would smash his pocket full-o'phone into our stairway banister. And thus, he cracked the screen. Good job little brother! Because of this (and because our contract said he could get a new phone at this time), he got a new phone. It was a pretty phone, with a camera and everything. A couple of weeks upon receiving this phone, he manages to throw it into a pool. This time, his phone didn't survive the watery depths and he had to transfer phones to another type of really old Samsung phone.
This old Samsung phone is the phone he has been using until he got this new Gravity phone. It has approximately 13 scratches on the front. Oh yeah, and it has a nice melted indentation on the top of the phone where he got mad one day and melted it on a pan on the stove. (???)
Congratulations on your new phone, little brother!
Yes. My brother got a new phone. You might wonder why I'm so confounded that he got a new phone, but never fear, explanation is imminent.
The first phone my brother had was a really old Samsung phone (no camera, black and white frontscreen). It was extremely small and fit in pants pockets with little to no notice by the user. My brother didn't notice it enough to remove it from his pocket before he washed his jeans. Miraculously, it survived the washing machine and the dryer!
This phone was also the same phone my brother took to Cedar Point, where it fell out of his pocket when he was on one of the rides. So of course, he got off the ride and realized his phone is missing. He came home and promptly ordered another phone. But then, someone mailed this phone back! Oh well. Two phones!
(Side note: during this intermediate phone missing time, my brother borrowed my mom's pretty pink Motorola Razr, which he promptly lost. We haven't found it since.)
The second phone was the one that my brother decided that he would smash his pocket full-o'phone into our stairway banister. And thus, he cracked the screen. Good job little brother! Because of this (and because our contract said he could get a new phone at this time), he got a new phone. It was a pretty phone, with a camera and everything. A couple of weeks upon receiving this phone, he manages to throw it into a pool. This time, his phone didn't survive the watery depths and he had to transfer phones to another type of really old Samsung phone.
This old Samsung phone is the phone he has been using until he got this new Gravity phone. It has approximately 13 scratches on the front. Oh yeah, and it has a nice melted indentation on the top of the phone where he got mad one day and melted it on a pan on the stove. (???)
Congratulations on your new phone, little brother!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Creep Sauce? Look it up!
I often use UrbanDictionary when I am perusing certain websites (such as Facebook and LiveJournal) and people use internet lingo that I haven't heard. And sometimes they say really dirty things that I get grossed out when I look up the word. Unfortunately, when I look up something and find out what it means, I can't un-look it up. Life is hard.
So yesterday, I learned about "creep sauce" and have been using it ever since. (Ok, so I think I used it in my GChat status for about five minutes.) (Oh yeah, "creep sauce" means "A creepy person, usually male.")
Today, I was talking with my friend G, and she looked me up! Of course, the only things about my name are wonderful and true, like "the epitome of glamour; a true rare TREASURE to the world; symbolizing perfection" and "a pig (derived from pig latin)" (yeah, wtf, but the example was about eating, which is about half of my life).
Of course, I used this opportunity to look her name up. I'm pretty sure that it means summer, but I got the shock of my life when I UrbanDcitionaryied it!! Check it:
"First, you get into a dentist chair. Then you strap yourself in. Your significant other/random hookup comes from behind and pours mountain dew over your chest. Once it is dry and sticky from the dew, your lover licks off your chest till its no longer sticky, but whats the point? It'll be sticky again anyway.
Once your chest is cleaned off, your lover gives you a lap dance and clucks like a chicken. Then you repeat John 3:16 till you are "enlightened"
This is how priests get 'taken care of' at a brothel."
UrbanDictionary is the truth.
So yesterday, I learned about "creep sauce" and have been using it ever since. (Ok, so I think I used it in my GChat status for about five minutes.) (Oh yeah, "creep sauce" means "A creepy person, usually male.")
Today, I was talking with my friend G, and she looked me up! Of course, the only things about my name are wonderful and true, like "the epitome of glamour; a true rare TREASURE to the world; symbolizing perfection" and "a pig (derived from pig latin)" (yeah, wtf, but the example was about eating, which is about half of my life).
Of course, I used this opportunity to look her name up. I'm pretty sure that it means summer, but I got the shock of my life when I UrbanDcitionaryied it!! Check it:
"First, you get into a dentist chair. Then you strap yourself in. Your significant other/random hookup comes from behind and pours mountain dew over your chest. Once it is dry and sticky from the dew, your lover licks off your chest till its no longer sticky, but whats the point? It'll be sticky again anyway.
Once your chest is cleaned off, your lover gives you a lap dance and clucks like a chicken. Then you repeat John 3:16 till you are "enlightened"
This is how priests get 'taken care of' at a brothel."
UrbanDictionary is the truth.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Mawwage is what bwings us togevah today
So my brother and my mother were reading the Jain Digest (a religious magazine) when my brother discovered that there were matrimonial ads in the back.
These matrimonials led me to think of one thing -- My shaadi.com (an Indian matrimonial site) profile that my friend had made for me as a joke. I hadn't logged onto it since basically November 2008...but I remembered getting a lot of poorly worded (ok, internet lingoed) messages (I went to go look for these messages, but I discovered that shaadi.com deletes messages after 45 days! WTF?)
In lieu of the missing messages, my brother asked to see my profile (which says really awesome things like I speak fluent French, Greek, Japanese, Russian and Turkish, and that I make $200k a year (which is clearly untrue because my only current source of income is from the stock market...).
In my profile, I made a startling discovery! SOMEONE HAD HACKED INTO MY PROFILE! Only about 10 people know my password, except the only people that I remember that know it are two fake boyfriends and friend who created it (ironically, one fake boyfriend is the password).
THE STARTLING DISCOVERY...
I am guessing that one of my fake boyfriends did this in order to sabotage my chances of ever finding a nice Indian boy to settle down with.
I also discovered that someone sent me an e-rose for Valentine's day. Also, I just found this little gem on someone's profile... "i am a nice person... i love my family especially my mummy.. she is the best woman... i want someone to take care of me like my mummy does..." Good luck finding someone to take care of you.
These matrimonials led me to think of one thing -- My shaadi.com (an Indian matrimonial site) profile that my friend had made for me as a joke. I hadn't logged onto it since basically November 2008...but I remembered getting a lot of poorly worded (ok, internet lingoed) messages (I went to go look for these messages, but I discovered that shaadi.com deletes messages after 45 days! WTF?)
In lieu of the missing messages, my brother asked to see my profile (which says really awesome things like I speak fluent French, Greek, Japanese, Russian and Turkish, and that I make $200k a year (which is clearly untrue because my only current source of income is from the stock market...).
In my profile, I made a startling discovery! SOMEONE HAD HACKED INTO MY PROFILE! Only about 10 people know my password, except the only people that I remember that know it are two fake boyfriends and friend who created it (ironically, one fake boyfriend is the password).
THE STARTLING DISCOVERY...
I am guessing that one of my fake boyfriends did this in order to sabotage my chances of ever finding a nice Indian boy to settle down with.
I also discovered that someone sent me an e-rose for Valentine's day. Also, I just found this little gem on someone's profile... "i am a nice person... i love my family especially my mummy.. she is the best woman... i want someone to take care of me like my mummy does..." Good luck finding someone to take care of you.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Things that I dislike
While this list may seem intuitive, it apparently isn't.
1. Red Eyeshadow. I once saw a girl wearing red eyeshadow to a dance (I think this was in high school?). I nearly had a heart attack!! It looked like she had pink eye so I stayed the hell away. Then I realized pink eye is never symmetric in both eyes. Or in both eyes. Because have you ever known anyone who has pink eye in both eyes? Yeah, me neither.
2. People at bars who pee on you. Yeah, this one time I was at the Jug around 10pm, and this guy was apparently really drunk (for some reason, people tend to start drinking really early on March 17 every year, I don't know why) and this guy totally did that. The bouncers threw him into the snow and gave me a shot and a t-shirt. I don't know if the shot was free because I didn't pay for anything that night. Oops.
3. Limes that look all nice and juicy on the outside, but when you squeeze them, NOTHING COMES OUT. What a tease! This, I find, mostly happens when limes are really old. Or if they are key limes in which cause they are always DRY.
4. People who are fake-busy on GChat. Come on. Everyone knows you're not really busy. If you were really busy, you wouldn't even be signed into GChat. (Sometimes I go fake-busy but only because I'm simultaneously signed into AIM and it never goes idle)
5. Haters. There are some people, I won't name names, but they exist, who think that my time spent excessively lazing around and traveling would be better spent getting a part-time job. Really? Really? Really? Why would I earn money when I can ~spend~ money?
6. The number 6. REALLY. Does it have to be so sixy?
7. Fabio Haters. FABIO IS THE BEST. He is soo dreamy and sexy, with luscious blond hair you just want to run your fingers through all the time.
8. Koala Bears. God they're creepy.
1. Red Eyeshadow. I once saw a girl wearing red eyeshadow to a dance (I think this was in high school?). I nearly had a heart attack!! It looked like she had pink eye so I stayed the hell away. Then I realized pink eye is never symmetric in both eyes. Or in both eyes. Because have you ever known anyone who has pink eye in both eyes? Yeah, me neither.
2. People at bars who pee on you. Yeah, this one time I was at the Jug around 10pm, and this guy was apparently really drunk (for some reason, people tend to start drinking really early on March 17 every year, I don't know why) and this guy totally did that. The bouncers threw him into the snow and gave me a shot and a t-shirt. I don't know if the shot was free because I didn't pay for anything that night. Oops.
3. Limes that look all nice and juicy on the outside, but when you squeeze them, NOTHING COMES OUT. What a tease! This, I find, mostly happens when limes are really old. Or if they are key limes in which cause they are always DRY.
4. People who are fake-busy on GChat. Come on. Everyone knows you're not really busy. If you were really busy, you wouldn't even be signed into GChat. (Sometimes I go fake-busy but only because I'm simultaneously signed into AIM and it never goes idle)
5. Haters. There are some people, I won't name names, but they exist, who think that my time spent excessively lazing around and traveling would be better spent getting a part-time job. Really? Really? Really? Why would I earn money when I can ~spend~ money?
6. The number 6. REALLY. Does it have to be so sixy?
7. Fabio Haters. FABIO IS THE BEST. He is soo dreamy and sexy, with luscious blond hair you just want to run your fingers through all the time.
8. Koala Bears. God they're creepy.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Connecting the Dots
I've heard that many people go through puberty twice in their lives. I'm pretty sure that I am one of these people, judging from my recent bout of pimples. Today, like every Sunday, I was doing my hair and makeup and taking pictures of myself for my future modeling career (I'd call my style less Heidi Klum and more Zoolander).
Anyway, I discovered a horrifying/amazing/mathematical positioning of my pimples.
Can you see it?? Here, I've made a mathematical diagram that further explains the mysterious Pimple Placement.
WHY IN THE WORLD ARE MY PIMPLES GROWING IN A TRIANGLE? It's a mathematical conspiracy. I would measure the angles of my pimples to further analyze the numbers, but I lost my protractor in the Great Mess of 2007.
The triangle ALMOST looks Isoceles, but it is actually Scalene! (I'm not sure because I lost my protractor)
I need to get rid of these before my Prom next Saturday.
Anyway, I discovered a horrifying/amazing/mathematical positioning of my pimples.
Can you see it?? Here, I've made a mathematical diagram that further explains the mysterious Pimple Placement.
WHY IN THE WORLD ARE MY PIMPLES GROWING IN A TRIANGLE? It's a mathematical conspiracy. I would measure the angles of my pimples to further analyze the numbers, but I lost my protractor in the Great Mess of 2007.
The triangle ALMOST looks Isoceles, but it is actually Scalene! (I'm not sure because I lost my protractor)
I need to get rid of these before my Prom next Saturday.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
I need a little Fabulous, is that so wrong?
High School Musical (HSM) is a wonderful set of movies aimed at young children (mostly girls?) and holds a set of sober values...right? WRONG!
It's actually a tool to make little kids become skanky!! That's right, SKANKY! While at first glance, the lyrics and themes are nothing more than something a 3rd grader might write, more scrutinizing of the films shows skankifiers that will un-Disneyfy ANYTHING.
1. Ryan and Sharpay in Everything
Ryan and Sharpay are twins, aka RELATED. They like to star in all the plays that East High School produces. In the first HSM, the play's main theme is a song called "What I've Been Looking For" (which ends a preposition, but we'll ignore that for now) which contains lyrics like "I've never had someone that knows me like you do the way you do" which can easily be placed in any love song. So this implies that Ryan and Sharpay are incestuous!! Because, let's be honest, high school productions ain't no fifth grade renditions of The Sound of Music where all the kids snicker and giggle when Leisl has to twirl into Rolfe's arms (sorry Sara and Johnny!). In high school, there are KISSING SCENES! Ew.
2. A Night to Remember
This one is a no brainer. In HSM3, the song "A Night to Remember" is about the Senior Prom. As we know from movies like American Pie, Senior Prom is often when movie adolescents lose their virginity. And with lyrics like "On the night of nights, you know we're gonna do it right," it's easy to imagine what "do it, right?" means (ok, maybe I added a superfluous comma and question mark). Yes, they will do it.
3. Can I have this Dance?
In HSM3, Gabriella's dress flies up a bunch of times and you can see her naughty bits. Just saying.
4. Troy Bolton
I basically get really turned on every time he sings. Or takes his shirt off. Or walks around.
*swoon*
It's actually a tool to make little kids become skanky!! That's right, SKANKY! While at first glance, the lyrics and themes are nothing more than something a 3rd grader might write, more scrutinizing of the films shows skankifiers that will un-Disneyfy ANYTHING.
1. Ryan and Sharpay in Everything
Ryan and Sharpay are twins, aka RELATED. They like to star in all the plays that East High School produces. In the first HSM, the play's main theme is a song called "What I've Been Looking For" (which ends a preposition, but we'll ignore that for now) which contains lyrics like "I've never had someone that knows me like you do the way you do" which can easily be placed in any love song. So this implies that Ryan and Sharpay are incestuous!! Because, let's be honest, high school productions ain't no fifth grade renditions of The Sound of Music where all the kids snicker and giggle when Leisl has to twirl into Rolfe's arms (sorry Sara and Johnny!). In high school, there are KISSING SCENES! Ew.
2. A Night to Remember
This one is a no brainer. In HSM3, the song "A Night to Remember" is about the Senior Prom. As we know from movies like American Pie, Senior Prom is often when movie adolescents lose their virginity. And with lyrics like "On the night of nights, you know we're gonna do it right," it's easy to imagine what "do it, right?" means (ok, maybe I added a superfluous comma and question mark). Yes, they will do it.
3. Can I have this Dance?
In HSM3, Gabriella's dress flies up a bunch of times and you can see her naughty bits. Just saying.
4. Troy Bolton
I basically get really turned on every time he sings. Or takes his shirt off. Or walks around.
*swoon*
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Vote on Smokefree House Bill 4341: Smoke-free environments are vital to the Michigan Economy
On this website, we can send letters to legislative people about how we feel on the smoke free Michigan issue. This is what I sent.
--
I'm originally from Michigan, but I had the opportunity to live in Cleveland, OH this past summer. When I visited the restaurants and bars, I noticed a drastic change in the way that I felt.
No, they don't serve better food or drink. They are smoke-free! I never had a temporary cough from all the smoke. I'm allergic to smoke and get headaches from inhaling it. I suppose not going out could be one solution to this problem, but should we really deny Michigan's economy MY support? Face it: I spend a lot of money at restaurants and bars. If I stopped going out, Michigan would be in much worse shape than it is now.
Bars don't need to be smoky. Please help save Michigan's economy by doing the right thing.
--
I googled it, and there are tonnes of people who are against this bill! Secondhand smoke is soo unhealthy! If Michigan were smokefree, I seriously doubt that people would stop going out.
What are we waiting for? Even OHIO is smoke free. Bitch please.
--
I'm originally from Michigan, but I had the opportunity to live in Cleveland, OH this past summer. When I visited the restaurants and bars, I noticed a drastic change in the way that I felt.
No, they don't serve better food or drink. They are smoke-free! I never had a temporary cough from all the smoke. I'm allergic to smoke and get headaches from inhaling it. I suppose not going out could be one solution to this problem, but should we really deny Michigan's economy MY support? Face it: I spend a lot of money at restaurants and bars. If I stopped going out, Michigan would be in much worse shape than it is now.
Bars don't need to be smoky. Please help save Michigan's economy by doing the right thing.
--
I googled it, and there are tonnes of people who are against this bill! Secondhand smoke is soo unhealthy! If Michigan were smokefree, I seriously doubt that people would stop going out.
What are we waiting for? Even OHIO is smoke free. Bitch please.
I have waaay too much school spirit. And that's a good thing!
Organizing my room also led to organizing of my craft shelves (2) and craft boxes (2). I discovered I had a bunch of shiny stud things, which led me to stud some items in the vein of bedazzling! (Although I don't have a Bedazzler, I really wish I did. Kidding! But only kind of.)
First, I had this old SHPE handheld mirror that was really reflective! So I decorated it. The inspiration for this is either the Sun, the Aztec/Mayan calendars, or leftover materials. You decide.
I also had this picture holder from my Toyota Tech Center days (although I can't figure out why you would ever give a picture holder to your interns...)
See, too much school spirit. Go Blue!
If you really want to buy these things, let me know and I will sell you them. Bwahahahaha.
First, I had this old SHPE handheld mirror that was really reflective! So I decorated it. The inspiration for this is either the Sun, the Aztec/Mayan calendars, or leftover materials. You decide.
I also had this picture holder from my Toyota Tech Center days (although I can't figure out why you would ever give a picture holder to your interns...)
See, too much school spirit. Go Blue!
If you really want to buy these things, let me know and I will sell you them. Bwahahahaha.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Love Letters
So, I finally organized/cleaned/vacuumed my room. It took me about three weeks but I can finally see the floor (and the surfaces, walls, etc.) I always love organizing my room because I get to find all the things I thought I'd lost (I always find money, too).
As I was going through my desk drawers, I discovered that I used to have a system in organizing my desk drawer. Well, it wasn't actually a system so much as I stored all my stationary in the 2nd drawer and piled anything else semi-resembling office supplies into the first and third drawers. I soon forgot my system and piled even more stuff onto my stationary.
(The reason that I have way too many things resembling office supplies is due to engineering career fairs. Really. I have 5 billion pens, hi-liters, toys all emblazoned with a company logo.)
My excessive amounts of stationary and gorgeous inked pens (and newly organized stationary drawer, see below) inspired a project: Love letters for my friends!
I posted a call for addresses on my GChat, AIM and Facebook statuses, and received an overwhelming response. Who doesn't love getting love letters? (Actually, I've never gotten one, but if you feel the need to write me one, I'd do a cartwheel)
I love love letters :) I'm on the first one right now...
As I was going through my desk drawers, I discovered that I used to have a system in organizing my desk drawer. Well, it wasn't actually a system so much as I stored all my stationary in the 2nd drawer and piled anything else semi-resembling office supplies into the first and third drawers. I soon forgot my system and piled even more stuff onto my stationary.
(The reason that I have way too many things resembling office supplies is due to engineering career fairs. Really. I have 5 billion pens, hi-liters, toys all emblazoned with a company logo.)
My excessive amounts of stationary and gorgeous inked pens (and newly organized stationary drawer, see below) inspired a project: Love letters for my friends!
I posted a call for addresses on my GChat, AIM and Facebook statuses, and received an overwhelming response. Who doesn't love getting love letters? (Actually, I've never gotten one, but if you feel the need to write me one, I'd do a cartwheel)
I love love letters :) I'm on the first one right now...
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