The Vest of Both Worlds

Yes, that is a Hannah Montana song reference in my title.

I redid a really old, huge blazer to make this adorabizzle vest!!

I made the roses, AND the buttons! I think I will wear this every single day.

Check it:

Adventure in the D!

Today, K and I took a trip to Detroit. Our main intention was to first eat linner (lunch/dinner) in Mexicantown, and then go to Hockeytown Cafe and watch the Red Wings win.

Here are some snippets of our D-venture!

A vastly decorated stop sign--I've noticed that many people like to decorate stop signs. They are octagons, which are less coolly shaped than yield signs (triangles).

The smooshed trashcan tied to a rusty lamp column.

See, if I were trying to be museumesque, I would use the word "juxtaposition" to describe this picture. Whenever I go to a museum, "juxtapose" or a form of it is often used to describe the scene. So...the juxtaposition of the old, decrepit building with the newer, pretty building trying to be seen behind it can be used to represent the D. It's a new city trying to get out of a bad reputation. Also, I really wanted to find a Church's Chicken juxtaposed with a real church but that didn't happen.

The Detroit Public Library has one of the coolest interiors I've ever seen in a public library. There are stained glass windows and a bunch of murals. Go check it out. Seriously.

Yay, my camera focused on something really close to it! FINALLY. This is a fence on the back of what used to be the front of the DIA, and you can kind of see the reflection of the DPL but not really.

Another decorated stop sign, all for you Kwame!

The roaring tiger in front of Comerica Park. RAWR! :) It's kind of cute.
Here is Athena, in a memorial fountain for Russell Alger. (?) I guess he is military.

They had Red Wings Trivia at Hockeytown Cafe, where we watched the Wings get to 3-0 in the series against the CBJ (just another reason to hate Co-LAME-bus). K and my phone-ternet helped us get to the final round to win stuff. But then we didn't win :(

They were giving away playoff beards at Hockeytown Cafe, and I asked the guy for two, so he gave me three. Let me know if you want one. Claimed by Dovbear. They are itchy and the hair gets stuck to everything, especially the mouth.

I think this is supposed to introduce a new energy source to Pakistan?

IOEs...I never know what to do with you :)



Ok, I might have giggled a tiny bit.

Cougar

With the recent premiere of a TVLand show called The Cougar (maybe I forgot about it but I seriously intended to watch!) I felt that this post is necessary.

I've been called a cougar before, mostly by gerbils and other small rodents. Ok, so maybe that's slightly untrue. However, I am in a facebook group called Cougar (for a Lab group) so I think that makes me qualified to write this post.

I was in Austin this past long weekend (maybe it was just long for me because I have about an 8-mo long weekend that I'm currently muddling through) and we went to Hillel for services. So there was this 30ish year lady there.

She was all out, wearing ass-tight jeans and a cleavage-baring top. She started talking to me, sticking her cleavage in my nose, so naturally I asked her what classes she was taking, what her major was, and blah blah blah. I discovered that she's in Calculus and she's majoring in 19 year old boys and student athletes.

Apparently she's had some conquests! I didn't know that Cougars actually got any. I almost asked her if she was a Cougar, but I'm sure she wouldn't have been too happy with that question from a girl she just met.

I can't wait til I'm 35 and can be a Cougar.

:Edited to Add: I just watched 20 minutes of The Cougar because they are showing repeats of it. This lady does not look talk like she's 40.

Quotes from the younguns:
"You do not look old enough to be a cougar...wait, that's wrong."
"I hope this cougar likes herself some lamb, because I am young and tender."

:ETA Some More: My friend (24) (who wishes to remain anonymous [because it's someone you might know]) has recently dated a cougar (42). Apparently my friend likes cougars, which I didn't know before, and this lady was barely on facebook (6 friends and a forgotten password)! Haha. Ok the reason he likes cougars is because they don't play games, and they just are what they are. She doesn't flake out, she's not about status and doesn't act like she's too good to be around you. So basically because she's not a girl, she's a woman! (Way past the in-between stage).

I dunno, I know a lot of girls that are my age (22) and still manage to find guys their age (22) that can put up with girly-ness :)

The Wild, Wild Midwest

April 5, 2009
1pm - Got Brunch with the bf, walked because it looked like a fine spring day.
5pm - It started raining and got me so da-amp.
6pm - Decided to stay in AA for an extra day so I could cook dinner for the bf

April 6, 2009
1am - Thought that staying might have been a poor decision because it started snowing
12pm - Woke up luxuriously and ate lunch (leftovers of prev. night's cooking)
1pm - Looked outside
1:01pm - Hid under covers for a few minutes because the entire outside had been erased and now was just a blank white piece of paper or similar. Decided to drive home at 3pm.
3pm - Did not drive home.
3:15pm - Reluctantly decided to drive home. Could not find car.
3:20pm - Found car, it had miraculously changed color from Sky Blue to White, no wonder couldn't find it. Was extremely thankful that my snow brush was still in the car
3:24 pm - Finished brushing THREE INCHES of snow off the car

April 7, 2009
1pm - Woke up, fell out of bed, dragged a comb across my head
2pm - The second snow of spring!
6:30 pm - Frosty the snow man was a very jolly soul. He was also excited that he got to unhibernate.
6:35pm - It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Because Safety is our Number One Priority

My dad got me all this seat belt material from work, and though I made a purse out of it years ago, I decided it was time for another one. Ta-Dah! With a zipper and fully lined.







All I want to know now is ... since it's made out of seat belts, it should keep all my money safe, right? Right.

Full Keyboard!

My family has recently come into some new electronic items. Our family computer just broke (not my doing, I use a different computer) so we just received a new computer in the mail. My dad decided to buy a Blackberry Pearl, and my brother just got a Samsung Gravity.

Yes. My brother got a new phone. You might wonder why I'm so confounded that he got a new phone, but never fear, explanation is imminent.

The first phone my brother had was a really old Samsung phone (no camera, black and white frontscreen). It was extremely small and fit in pants pockets with little to no notice by the user. My brother didn't notice it enough to remove it from his pocket before he washed his jeans. Miraculously, it survived the washing machine and the dryer!

This phone was also the same phone my brother took to Cedar Point, where it fell out of his pocket when he was on one of the rides. So of course, he got off the ride and realized his phone is missing. He came home and promptly ordered another phone. But then, someone mailed this phone back! Oh well. Two phones!

(Side note: during this intermediate phone missing time, my brother borrowed my mom's pretty pink Motorola Razr, which he promptly lost. We haven't found it since.)

The second phone was the one that my brother decided that he would smash his pocket full-o'phone into our stairway banister. And thus, he cracked the screen. Good job little brother! Because of this (and because our contract said he could get a new phone at this time), he got a new phone. It was a pretty phone, with a camera and everything. A couple of weeks upon receiving this phone, he manages to throw it into a pool. This time, his phone didn't survive the watery depths and he had to transfer phones to another type of really old Samsung phone.

This old Samsung phone is the phone he has been using until he got this new Gravity phone. It has approximately 13 scratches on the front. Oh yeah, and it has a nice melted indentation on the top of the phone where he got mad one day and melted it on a pan on the stove. (???)

Congratulations on your new phone, little brother!

Creep Sauce? Look it up!

I often use UrbanDictionary when I am perusing certain websites (such as Facebook and LiveJournal) and people use internet lingo that I haven't heard. And sometimes they say really dirty things that I get grossed out when I look up the word. Unfortunately, when I look up something and find out what it means, I can't un-look it up. Life is hard.

So yesterday, I learned about "creep sauce" and have been using it ever since. (Ok, so I think I used it in my GChat status for about five minutes.) (Oh yeah, "creep sauce" means "A creepy person, usually male.")

Today, I was talking with my friend G, and she looked me up! Of course, the only things about my name are wonderful and true, like "the epitome of glamour; a true rare TREASURE to the world; symbolizing perfection" and "a pig (derived from pig latin)" (yeah, wtf, but the example was about eating, which is about half of my life).

Of course, I used this opportunity to look her name up. I'm pretty sure that it means summer, but I got the shock of my life when I UrbanDcitionaryied it!! Check it:

"First, you get into a dentist chair. Then you strap yourself in. Your significant other/random hookup comes from behind and pours mountain dew over your chest. Once it is dry and sticky from the dew, your lover licks off your chest till its no longer sticky, but whats the point? It'll be sticky again anyway.
Once your chest is cleaned off, your lover gives you a lap dance and clucks like a chicken. Then you repeat John 3:16 till you are "enlightened"
This is how priests get 'taken care of' at a brothel."

UrbanDictionary is the truth.

Mawwage is what bwings us togevah today

So my brother and my mother were reading the Jain Digest (a religious magazine) when my brother discovered that there were matrimonial ads in the back.

These matrimonials led me to think of one thing -- My shaadi.com (an Indian matrimonial site) profile that my friend had made for me as a joke. I hadn't logged onto it since basically November 2008...but I remembered getting a lot of poorly worded (ok, internet lingoed) messages (I went to go look for these messages, but I discovered that shaadi.com deletes messages after 45 days! WTF?)

In lieu of the missing messages, my brother asked to see my profile (which says really awesome things like I speak fluent French, Greek, Japanese, Russian and Turkish, and that I make $200k a year (which is clearly untrue because my only current source of income is from the stock market...).

In my profile, I made a startling discovery! SOMEONE HAD HACKED INTO MY PROFILE! Only about 10 people know my password, except the only people that I remember that know it are two fake boyfriends and friend who created it (ironically, one fake boyfriend is the password).

THE STARTLING DISCOVERY...

I am guessing that one of my fake boyfriends did this in order to sabotage my chances of ever finding a nice Indian boy to settle down with.

I also discovered that someone sent me an e-rose for Valentine's day. Also, I just found this little gem on someone's profile... "i am a nice person... i love my family especially my mummy.. she is the best woman... i want someone to take care of me like my mummy does..." Good luck finding someone to take care of you.

Things that I dislike

While this list may seem intuitive, it apparently isn't.

1. Red Eyeshadow. I once saw a girl wearing red eyeshadow to a dance (I think this was in high school?). I nearly had a heart attack!! It looked like she had pink eye so I stayed the hell away. Then I realized pink eye is never symmetric in both eyes. Or in both eyes. Because have you ever known anyone who has pink eye in both eyes? Yeah, me neither.

2. People at bars who pee on you. Yeah, this one time I was at the Jug around 10pm, and this guy was apparently really drunk (for some reason, people tend to start drinking really early on March 17 every year, I don't know why) and this guy totally did that. The bouncers threw him into the snow and gave me a shot and a t-shirt. I don't know if the shot was free because I didn't pay for anything that night. Oops.

3. Limes that look all nice and juicy on the outside, but when you squeeze them, NOTHING COMES OUT. What a tease! This, I find, mostly happens when limes are really old. Or if they are key limes in which cause they are always DRY.

4. People who are fake-busy on GChat. Come on. Everyone knows you're not really busy. If you were really busy, you wouldn't even be signed into GChat. (Sometimes I go fake-busy but only because I'm simultaneously signed into AIM and it never goes idle)

5. Haters. There are some people, I won't name names, but they exist, who think that my time spent excessively lazing around and traveling would be better spent getting a part-time job. Really? Really? Really? Why would I earn money when I can ~spend~ money?

6. The number 6. REALLY. Does it have to be so sixy?

7. Fabio Haters. FABIO IS THE BEST. He is soo dreamy and sexy, with luscious blond hair you just want to run your fingers through all the time.

8. Koala Bears. God they're creepy.